At the dawn of a new semester, there is this daunting image of billions of highlighters, ink stains on your favorite white sweater, and undereye circles resembling the coffee ring in that novel you love the most. However, at the dawn of this semester, I find myself free of those pesky undereye circles and with so much time on my hands, that I cook almost every night and even make it to the gym in the wee hours of the morning.

How is it possible to be this bored during my junior year of college? I have time to knit. Yes, you heard correctly, I said knit. I like to embrace the little old lady inside of me and fashion a scarf or two and bake cookies. It’s a strange situation when I have free time. Normally, I’m riddled with stress and compulsive eye twitching, but now, I’m seemingly stress free and comfortably caffeinated.

I even had the time to notice the attractive, strapping young man checking me out at the gym this morning. He was tall, blond, and just the right amount of muscular to not come off too intimidating for my average physique. But, did I do anything about the flirtatious eye-contact and “coincidental” run-ins at various machines? Of course not. In typical Alex fashion, I lowered my gaze and did absolutely nothing. Why? I couldn’t even begin to explain the insanity of my inaction. I could chalk it up to insecurities and low self-esteem, but many a friend in the past has pointed out that I am the most oblivious person on the planet.

As an aspiring writer, it seems quite odd that I would be so inattentive to my own surroundings in real life and so attentive to the details scribbled on the page of imagined reality. But when it comes to men, I just shut down. I ignore what could be my fairytale ending – or at least a flash fiction – and go on with my boring life. I wonder how often I’ve passed up an opportunity for excitement of any kind. Never mind, I’d rather not know the sad statistics.

Maybe one day I’ll have the courage to say something. Do I honestly need a sign to obnoxiously flash in my face before I take the 21st century by the hand and make the first move? I’m not going to lie, it’s possible, but maybe I’ll push the doubt aside and just do it. Hopefully one day soon before the semester picks up and I’m back to my twitchy self.