Quiet nights have become my solace. Warm chocolate chip cookies on a platter, coffee in hand – the introvert’s happy place. Candles dwindle into puddles of wax while I revel in the comfort of my cozy apartment. Who needs a night out on the town when sweatpants and fuzzy socks can keep you company enough? To many, this may seem pathetic for a woman in her twenties, but who cares. I was never the grimy bar or club scene type, anyway.

I find comfort in routine and spending my days in the environment I create for myself. Why then, is it pertinent for people to tell you to get out more because you only live once? I’m highly aware of this fact, thank you very much, and can do without the constant preaching and judgmental comments. When did it become acceptable for society to try and tell you how to live your life?

I guess it has been happening for centuries, but I only recently realized the subtle undertones of judgment from those around me in my own life. It can be as simple as a cocked eyebrow at the sight of what I’d like to say is my magnificently colorful hair or a scornful glance at my nose ring. I find that so many of the people I have encountered are fans of the backhanded compliment or condescending pretentious remarks. All I have to say is why? If I’m treating you with respect, why can’t you return the favor and do the same?

If I externalized every snap judgment I made within the confines of my mind, I probably wouldn’t still have my job. I know that it is in our nature to make assumptions and maybe even judge others prematurely, but society has taken it to a whole new level. When did it become wrong to be an individual?

One thing I have prided myself on is my independence and willingness to be myself. I’ve never wanted to be an insignificant part of the crowd; I wanted to be a one-woman show with her own unique beliefs and interests, and I did just that. It’s a struggle to detach yourself from the mainstream, but it is such a relief when you readjust your focus to just you. Trust me, someone someday will appreciate you for exactly who you are. Embrace your individuality, and don’t let the judgements of others deter you from the path you created for yourself.

It took me a long time to accept myself for who I am. Growing up at the height of the technological age, it was so easy to fall into a rut and compare myself to unattainable ideals. I learned to create my own rules and ideals, and it is still a struggle every day to find that solace. The solace that can always be found at the bottom of a coffee mug or in the cookie crumbs left on the plate.